Friday, February 25, 2005
Columbo vs. Hello Kitty
I will admit that I don’t exactly know what in the hell Hello Kitty is or what it’s all about; But I am going to get to the bottom of this phenomenon and more importantly evaluate if the greatest detective of the modern era can kick its ass.
- Symbolizes generosity, innocence, kindness, friendship, ext.
- Lives in London, England, and in the 3rd Grade
- Travels the world making new friends
- Birth date: November 1st, 1974
- Weight: the same as 3 apples (side note – APPLES! why can’t she weigh a few ounces or 1.4 eggplants)
- Likes: small, cute things, candy, stars, goldfish, etc
- Trademark: red bow on left ear.
- Best product: Hello Kitty vibrator
- Born: September 16, 1927, New York, NY
- Appeared to have an unassuming, disorganized, and polite demeanor
- Underestimated by all criminals
- Drives old Peugeot with over 100,000 miles
- Worked in Homicide for 15 years at the Los Angeles police department
- Fought in Korea for the U.S. Army
- Wears a rumpled overcoat and smokes stubby cigars
Winner: Columbo; The Hello Kitty Vibrator does seem pretty intriguing but everything else about this curious product disturbs me for some reason. On the other hand Lieutenant Columbo is the shit.